On Drunkeness
Being a discourse on period terms for various types of drunkards
By Captain Fox (With thanks to 'ECW Notes & Queries' - Caliver Books/Partizan Press)

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In modern times we all know how various people take to alcohol, and these always seem to fall into various categories of drunkards. Such as the 'Sleepy Drunk', the 'Nasty Drunk', the 'Quiet Drunk', the 'Horny Drunk', etc., but drunkards were called different names during the seventeenth century.

What follows then are period terms for eight various kinds of drunkards. See how many of these you have you seen at musters (and who were they)?!?

"The first is Ape drunk, and he leaps, and sings, and hollows and dances for the heavens;"

"The second is Lion drunk, and he flings the pots about the house, calls his Hostess whore, breaks the glass windows with his dagger, and is apt to quarrel with any man that speaks to him;"

"The third is Swine drunk, heavy lumpish, and sleepy, and cries for a little more drink, and a few more clothes;"

"The fourth is Sheep drunk, wise in his conceit, when he cannot bring forth a right word;"

"The fifth is Maudlin drunk, when a fellow will weep for kindness in the midst of ale, and kiss you, saying: 'By God Captain I love thee, go thy ways thou dost not think so often of me as I do thee, I would (if it pleased God) I could not love thee as well as I do', and then he puts his finger in his eye, and cries;"

"The sixth is Martin drunk, when a man is drunk and drinks himself sober ere he stir;"

"The seventh is Goat drunk, when in his drunkenness he hath no mind but on Lechery;"

"The eighth is Fox drunk, as many of the Dutchmen be, will never bargain but when they are drunk."

Hopefully people ever attending one of the Society Christ-Tide Revels in New Jersey/New York will remember these, and especially on New Year's Eve!


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